Category: IMO

Why is it so many of us can’t overcome failure and ultimately become successful? Is it because we’re undisciplined or stupid? The reasons experts cite may surprise you.

International speaker and author, Grant Cardone, states that, “failure is promoted in our society as the norm and success as the exception”(1). While high-tech senior exec turned high-powered CBS news journalist, Steve Tobak, states that previous success ruins future success because we “begin to think we have all the answers”(2).

While these explanations seem to fly in the face of common belief, if they’re accurate then our chances of continued failure seem likely as there are numerous other, more time-tested, ways to fail. These would include putting too much pressure on oneself, lacking education or experience, and not having the necessary confidence or know how. The odds of failure seem almost insurmountable. However, we all know people who’ve experienced success, so what are ways you can emulate them?

1. Think positively – WebMD states, “negative thoughts can make your depression worse or can raise your chances of having depression”(3). This means that negative thinking increases the likelihood of negative results. Instead of thinking, “I can’t do this,” try, “I’m not going to fail this time.”

2. Don’t quit – “I don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but by how high he bounces when he hits bottom.” – George S Patton (4). People often fail to succeed because they quit trying too soon. To avoid this, get back to working on these ambitions as soon as possible. You can help ensure this by either marking a calendar or having someone you trust remind you.

3. Surround yourself with supportive people – Repeated failure is often the result of trying to do it all on your own. Instead, surround yourself with people who are supportive of your ambitions. Much like Helen Keller’s mother did when she wanted her daughter to be educated. The first few months Helen spent with her tutor, Anne Sullivan, were filled with failure. Eventually though, Helen had her famous water breakthrough in 1887(5).

4. Learn from your mistakes – “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison. People ultimately fail because they don’t see the value in failing. Instead of wallowing in self-loathing about how you didn’t achieve yet again, look at why you didn’t. If you feel you can’t see the problem(s) objectively then talk to a trusted friend.

5. Revise your strategy – Failure is often a result of faulty strategy. Regardless of whether this is because of poor planning or not having all the facts, it’s necessary to incorporate this acquired knowledge into a new and improved approach. For example, if you didn’t consider a number of minor details then write out a new strategy that takes these into account. If you determine that there were major reasons why you failed, maybe it’s necessary to include a professional strategist as part of your revised strategy.

6. Stay realistic – Quixotic (adj.) – extravagantly chivalrous or romantic; visionary, impractical, or impracticable (6). When you remain quixotic despite previous failings, you continue to doom your dreams. Ask yourself these two questions: one, are my goals attainable and two, are my methods sound? If the answer to either is “no” then adjustments are necessary.

7. Regenerate your motivation – Failure is exhausting, which often perpetuates further failure. When you regenerate your motivation, you give yourself the chance to power through setbacks and reach new heights.

In the ’92 NBA Finals Michael Jordan poured in 35 points because someone had suggested that an opposing player was better (7). By using this and many other perceived slights he ultimately became the greatest basketball player who ever lived. While this tactic was exclusive to his situation, a way the rest of us can regenerate motivation is to focus on the benefits of success.

Click here for the reasons why we fail and 101 ways to overcome failure

8. Remind yourself why this goal is important – Failure is sometimes due to the paths of success being so long that we forget why we originally started and wander off. By writing out why the goal is important to you, you can have a consistent and accessible reminder that will help keep you on the straight and narrow.

9. Don’t fixate on failing – People often fail to achieve success because they are too busy reliving their past failures. By not focusing on this, you can give your mind the chance to think positively and focus on a new strategy. If you have difficulty not fixating on failings then it might be wise to lean more on the people around you. Tell them that you need a shift in attitude from time to time.

10. Take small steps – A final reason why people don’t ultimately experience success is because they try to do too much too quick after a failing. When you get back to work on your goals, it’s wise to start slow and take small steps. In fact, if you Google “steps to success” you’ll come up with scores of hits that break down the process into 10, 12, or even 25 step (8). This is primarily because experts know that a return from failure requires incremental recommitment to the goal. By evaluating these online strategies, you take the first step in returning to your ambitions.

Conclusion

For many of us, overcoming failures and returning to the path of success isn’t easy. After all, with all the ways one can fail, and fail repeatedly, it can be painful to try again. However, we know that there are people who are successful, so we know it isn’t impossible for a person to achieve their goals. The idea is that by utilizing these tips, whether alone or in combination, you too can become someone cites as an example of success. The only question is: Will you do it?

Citations 

1.  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/grant-cardone/why-people-fail_b_560253.html

2.  http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505125_162-57393888/9-reasons-why-people-fail/

3. http://www.webmd.com/depression/depression-using-positive-thinking

4. http://www.cybernation.com/victory/quotations/subjects/quotes_failure.html

5. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_Keller

6. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/quixotic?s=t

7. http://articles.latimes.com/2009/jan/06/sports/sp-ravens6

8. http://www.google.com/search?q=steps+to+success

 

Too much stress can not only reduce our enjoyment of daily life, but also contribute to fatigue, loss or gain in appetite, problems with sleeping and even other, more serious medical issues, especially those that involve heart health. Proper stress management is necessary to help us lead more productive, enjoyable lives and while a little stress can be a good thing, too much of it can lead to serious negative effects on our overall health. Here are a five quick ways to help relieve stress while at work or in the home.

Time Out: If the stress is being caused at work, then taking a time out can help break the cycle of stress and refocus the mind on the tasks at hand, rather than worrying about the ramifications of what might be. This means stepping away from the computer, leaving the desk and taking a time out, a few minutes to put into perspective what has happened before going back to work.

Exercise: One of the best methods to relieve stress is to literally work the feelings out of our system. Proper exercise not only improves the health of our bodies, it also focuses our minds away from what is causing the stress and is an important part of stress management. In particular, aerobic activity that works the entire body or even something more simple as jogging or walking can ease the mind while improving the spirit. Exercising five days a week, even it only for 20 minutes a day, alternating between aerobic and anaerobic exercise, which is either using free weights or simply bodyweight exercises such as push up, sit ups and the like can significantly relieve stress. Yoga for example is one of the best exercises for good stress management as it emphasizes the mind and well as the body.

Stillpoint: A stillpoint is a therapeutic technique that came from therapies involving osteopathy and craniosacral, which breaks the body’s own stress cycle and refocuses the mind away from thoughts which are augmenting the stress. This simple technique, which generally only takes 5 to 10 minutes, can help you relieve stress effectively by using the power of the mind.

Bathe: Seems simple enough, but taking a bath or refreshing shower can help break the cycle of stress. It puts our minds into another place and away from the feelings that are causing the buildup of stress. A good, long hot shower can do the trick, but many people turn towards soaking in the tub to help ease their minds. You can even make a bath a spa-like experience, a sort of mini-vacation if you will from life’s daily grind.

Day Off: Not so much a vacation, more of a day off to take our minds away from our troubles. Find a stress relieving activity that you enjoy and plan part of your day around it, whether you decide to take time off work or on your normal day off, this should be your time to go to a spa, take a relaxing afternoon at the park or simply engage in your favorite activity that helps re-set the mind and take away the stress.

Stress Management: 101 Best Ways to Relieve Stress and Really Live Life now available at the Kindle store and other great retailers.

Fear impacts everyone. Actor Dean Martin was terrified of elevators. Actor Johnny Depp is reportedly afraid of clowns. From an evolutionary standpoint, fear serves as a survival mechanism, drawing humans and animals away from perceived danger. But while some fears have value, many others are irrational and unnecessary, serving only to inhibit rather than protect. For example, if you are afraid to step into a lion’s cage, you are probably very wise, but if you fear speaking in front of a large crowd, your phobia is largely irrational. Public speaking presents little if any physical danger, assuming you do not have a violently hostile crowd in front of you. You can overcome your unnecessary and inhibitory fears, but you will have to step outside your comfort zone.

With any fear, you must first ask yourself, “What am I really afraid of?” For example, you might say, “I’m afraid of bugs,” but there is more going on beneath the surface. What specifically unnerves you about insects? Is it the potential of being bitten or poisoned? Is it simply the thought of having slimy creatures crawl on your skin? Maybe it’s just the fact that insects can easily hide in plain sight. A fear of insects, or entomphobia, has some rational aspects, since some bug bites and stings pose a legitimate danger, but if you educate yourself, you can begin to overcome this fear. For example, learn how to identify the bugs that carry venom and disease, and learn everything you can about insects in general. This will take away much of their mystique. Gently face your fear, perhaps by raising some butterflies or visiting insect exhibits at your local museum.

Public speaking, as previously mentioned, is another very common fear. But once again, the first step is to determine exactly what you fear about public speaking. Is it the prospect of looking foolish? Being judged by others? Unlike some other fears, you actually have full control over this one. Once you figure out exactly what you’re afraid of, you can plan your speech accordingly. For instance, if you are afraid of forgetting your lines, then prepare by rehearsing vigorously or making note cards. If you fear judgment from others, share your speech with trusted friends and relatives before taking the podium. Trusted confidants can offer you valuable feedback and help you to polish your material. Lastly, as with most fears, you can benefit greatly from facing the phobia head on. Practice speaking in front of groups whenever you can, and accept that you are going to make mistakes, especially early on. The more you do it, the easier it will become.

The “face your fears directly” approach is useful for a variety of phobias. Fear of failure is a perfect example. Maybe your parents were never satisfied with anything you accomplished, leaving you with a lasting sense that you will never be good enough. By setting specific goals and working hard to accomplish them, you can reclaim that power.

The actress Whoopi Goldberg once suffered a terrible fear of flying that kept her off of airplanes for 13 years. But when she accepted a job as a talk show host for The View, she decided to face her fear and step aboard commercial planes again. Facing your fears head-on is never easy, but it can yield great rewards.

But what if you cannot identify your core fear? For example, you live in constant fear of losing your job, but you cannot figure out why. Your company is successful and you are a stellar employee. By all accounts, you should have nothing to worry about, and yet the fear remains day after day. When you cannot figure out why a seemingly irrational fear haunts you, it’s time to do a bit of soul searching. Think of events in your life that may be connected to your present fear. Maybe you have been laid off in the past, or maybe you simply remember periods of unemployment during which you struggled to make ends meet. Past events can leave an indelible impression, but sometimes you can overcome fears just by identifying and acknowledging their connection to past events. Remind yourself that your past does not define your future.

Beyond that, a big secret to overcoming fear is actively preventing it from coming to fruition. If you fear losing your job, open a savings account and start putting money away. By taking control of your finances, you can reduce or eliminate the fear of being left helpless by sudden unemployment. This proactive approach can also help you if you have a fear of dying young. By exercising daily, eating healthy foods, avoiding risky behaviors and consulting a physician for all of your necessary checkups, you can restore confidence in your good health and eliminate worries about your mortality.

Sometimes, though, a fear can become an obsession. If you obsess over your health every day but still live in crippling fear of dying young, you have a more serious problem. Any fear can become an obsession. For example, a basic fear of heights is perfectly rational, but if your fear of heights is so strong that it impacts your ability to function, you may need to seek cognitive behavioral therapy. Cognitive behavioral therapy is useful for all types of crippling fear, as it helps you to rewire your thinking so that the fear no longer dominates your mind.

Besides therapy, support groups can be an invaluable resource for overcoming fears. For example, if you have a fear of social interactions, you can benefit from joining a support group filled with people who share your phobia. Since they all have the same anxieties and understand your situation, you need not endure the same feelings of judgment that you would feel in most social situations, and the group can offer you invaluable encouragement.

Mark Twain once quipped, “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.” Whatever fear may be holding you back, understand that you owe it to yourself to take control and live the life that you deserve. Start mastering your fears today.

Everyone wants to have a successful life filled with the luxuries of time and money. It seems that only the rich and famous have it all together, but in reality, anyone can do what they do. Sometimes, the only thing that is stopping us from getting things done is ourselves. Continuing to blame others or situations for your shortcomings won’t rip you out of your rut. Getting things done isn’t always easy, especially when you have to work long hours, have children to raise or lack the power and will to self-manage your priorities. Whether you are falling behind in your career or personal life, you can benefit from the following time management tips on breaking free from the claws of procrastination.

Get Organized: Write Down and Sort Out Your Priorities

One of the first steps for beating procrastination is to know what you’re procrastinating on. It’s easier to procrastinate if you don’t have a priority list.  Place it somewhere visible, like on the fridge or on your desk. Write down your personal and business related goals, then reorganize them to reflect what’s most important to you. This list will help you to stay on the right path, and the victory doesn’t come until you have conquered them all.

Example: The items on your list are to write a book, teach your kid to ride a bike and write a business report for work. These areas deal with your career, hobby and personal family life. Likely, your work will be top priority because without a steady paycheck, you won’t have time for your family or hobbies. Next on the list could be teaching your child to ride a bike, since that is short-term and then you can start on the novel you’ve been dreaming up for months or even years.

Create a Schedule With Deadlines

A lot of procrastinators make the mistake of taking on too much or too little of their tasks. With a schedule, you can make time each day to work on your list of priorities, allowing you to slowly but surely get everything out of the way. Having deadlines is the key, but don’t overdo it; be realistic with your goals. Check off each task you complete – sometimes, visuals can help to motivate you. When you see how much progress you are making, it will give you a boost to continue forward. Counting down to the due date can also create a sense of urgency to complete your tasks.

Be Affirmative: Work Towards Your Priorities Everyday

Tomorrow is a word you can never repeat again. If you’re like many, you like to put everything off ‘til “tomorrow” – a day that never seems to come for procrastinators. Instead of using terms like “later” and “eventually”, you should use the word “now”. Getting things done right then and there, even if it you’re unable to complete the full task, is better than continuously delaying it. For example, if you have an extra ten minutes after work, don’t waste it lounging around, start typing up your novel or work on the report with the a looming due date.

Get a Partner

A lot of people need a nudge here and there to keep things moving along. Just like folks tend to get a workout partner, consider getting someone that can either help you or keep you company while you complete your tasks. Of course, the person you choose should NOT be a procrastinator. Pick someone who motivates you.

Use Peer Pressure to Your Advantage

Let everyone know about your goals and they will keep you on your toes. The pressure of their expectations will keep your expectations high. When you feel like you have something to prove, you are more than likely to prove it.

Break Down Your Tasks into Bite-Size Pieces

Once again, biting off more than you can chew is never a good idea. In fact, it will only discourage you from completing the task. So if you have a large project, such as a 50,000 word novel, don’t try to complete it all in one weekend. Break down the task into smaller ones. For instance, you can commit to completing 500 words a day, which is only about 1-2 pages. The same can be done for other areas, like writing a white paper for work or cleaning up your cluttered attic. Eliminate the feeling of being overwhelmed by taking it easy.  Stephen King writes 10 pages daily, everyday of the year, including holidays, but you can space out your tasks to where you’re comfortable. Here’s a great time management tips book for 101 ways to manage your time better.

Reward Yourself for Staying on Schedule

After each week or month, reward yourself. This can be tickets to a sports game or going out to eat. Whatever would motivate (or bribe) you to complete your tasks.

Make Yourself Inaccessible

Let your family and friends know about your schedule, so that you won’t have as many interruptions. If you have a home office, complete your tasks there or if it has to do with cleaning or spending time with family, then alienate yourself from distractions that can be caused by the outside world, like work and friends. You should also avoid distractions like television and the Internet. Have everything off and avoid social networks and web surfing, which can easily waste hours of your time.

Tackle the Small Tasks First

As you break out of the habits of procrastination, you will be able to taste the flavor of success quicker by starting with smaller projects. Complete the smaller tasks first and use the sense of accomplishment you feel to drive you to continue on to your bigger tasks.

Figure Out Your Peak Period and Time Limit

Some people work best in the morning, late at night or in the afternoon. Figure out your peak period and how long you can commit to a task without frying your brain or wearing out your body.

After you have stemmed from the pit of procrastination, you will feel great. Hopefully, the feel of success will fuel your fire and annihilate your procrastinating ways. Stop delaying and get started today!

“Before everything else, getting ready is the secret of success.” –Henry Ford

Because of your support over the past year we have served more people with more solutions than any other time in our 10-year history. We are grateful and thankful for the opportunity to serve you.

As an expression of our gratitude and in the spirit of this Thanksgiving week in the U.S. we’d like to share three very special ebooks with you:

• The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Dr. Joseph Murphy is the original version of this classic best-seller that has changed the lives of more than a million people worldwide.
• Secret of the Ages by Robert Collier is another million-seller and is one of the most powerful self-help books ever written.
• The Miracle of Right Thought by Orison Swett Marden is one of those books that’s hard to put down after you start reading it and it very definitely will jolt you into new ways of thinking.

We sell these books everyday on our site and they’re available at Amazon.com and other booksellers as well.

But we’d like you to have these books — as our gift — in our gratitude for being one of our valued subscribers. The only thing we’d like to ask of you is to please read at least one of these books BEFORE the end of the year. It will dramatically change the way you look at 2012 and your future going forward.

Please download now as this link is only good for one week. You will need to un-zip the file to retrieve the three ebooks. Then you will need Adobe Acrobat Reader or similar software to read these pdf files.

Happy Thanksgiving wherever you live, and thank you again for your patronage.

Download My Gratitude Gift

(Windows users be sure to right-click and Save Target As)

Thanks to your support, Jim Rohn’s first eBook at the Kindle bookstore, My Philosophy for Successful Living, recently ranked #51 out of more than 850,000 ebooks.

I know there will be many Jim Rohn eBooks in the future, but we will always cherish the help you gave on this one!

Here are a couple of “gifts” in addition to the promo gifts we distributed.

The first one is a magnificent poem called Don’t Quit (Windows users should right click to download).

The second one is a pamphlet written in the 1920’s by R.H. Jarrett called It Works! (Windows users should right click to download).

Hope you enjoy both of them!

Would be interested in hearing your comments below on what you thought of these.

As we celebrate our 10th Anniversary on the Web, I guess it’s about time to put a blog up on this site. 🙂

While we’ve had blogs on some of our other sites for going on six years, we just never quite got around to it on our granddaddy of them all site.

But a new decade harkens and I know that many of our subscribers who’ve asked for this over the years will now sit back and say, “it’s about time!”

So we’re off and running! And our first order of business is to get you some great content from our first 10 years.

So stay tuned for some great audios from Jim Rohn, Bob Proctor, Denis Waitley, yours truly and more.

And now, more than ever, we really do appreciate you supporting our site 🙂

– Vic

P.S. Your comments and input are always welcome and we’d be honored if you’d share our site with your Facebook, Twitter and other friends!